Even though I drive a Porsche Cayenne as my daily drive, I would be the first to admit that it’s not the prettiest car in the world. Despite being quite possibly the best all-round car on the road, it doesn’t win any beauty contests. So why then are car tuners around the world hell-bent on making it even uglier?
Gemballa do extreme versions of the Porsche Cayenne, like the Gemballa Tornado 750 GTS, which looks like a four-wheeled Darth Vader. But at least I sort of see the point of its extremes. But Romanian Car Tuners
Naff Maff have succeeded in making the most pointless Cayenne abomination I’ve ever seen – the Porsche Cayenne Naff Maff Design Moron Muron.
The easy criticism is that its’ a Footballers Car – all flash and no taste. But actually, a lot of Footballers (well, some anyway) have pretty decent taste in cars, and I’m sure most wouldn’t be seen dead in the Maff Design Muron.
Maff have added all manner of fibreglass extremes to the Cayenne, making a gaping-mouthed monstrosity that’s enough to frighten small children who are unlucky enough to come across it. But Maff are taking no chances that the exterior abominations recede from the memory once you’re inside the car – they’ve done an equally tacky job of the inside.
But there is one saving grace for the Maff Muron Cayenne – engine upgrades. They’ve managed to squeeze up to 700bhp out of the Cayennes 4.8 litre Turbo, which will give some pretty impressive performance figures, aided by the widened track and lowered suspension. But even that’s 50bhp short of what Gemballa have managed with the Tornado 750 GTS.
Sorry, this is a pointless waste of money.